Lately, the only truly scary thing about my closet (besides the Boogeyman, but that's what the lock on my closet door is for) is that I keep forgetting about its contents. Once again, I discovered a cardigan I'd bought a MONTH AGO and forgot to wear. I remedied that on Wednesday. However, I was never home to take an outfit photo. So you'll just have to take my word for it - the green/grey cardi from Target exists, and it is lovely.
Although I love my closets now (except for the Boogeyman - he is dead to me), this has not always been the case. Let me share a few of the terrifying items that once lurked in those dark depths...
1. Mom-waisted jeans. Not only did I own such jeans, I pegged them, and then covered the safety pins with scrunchy socks or legwarms. Oh 80's. You were an ugly, uncomfortable time.
2. Stirrup pants. I WISH these had just been big in the 80's! Stirrups made their evil ways known to my closets all the way up until I graduated college. In '94. ICK. And stirrup pants never had enough Lycra in them, so I always bagged them out/wore them out in the knees. I have very bony knees, folks.
3. Overalls. Just... no. Unless you are painting a house, you should not own overalls. Ever. I don't care what TLC wears in their videos. YOU ARE NOT TLC. Rest in peace, Left-Eye.
4. Converse sneakers. Guys, look. I know all those hipsters out there are sporting their Converse all over town. You might even be one of those hipsters. Heck, some of my friends are hipsters, and they wear Converse in my presence. And I refrain from making snarky comments about how the cast from Singles wants their shoes back. Because I love my friends, and everyone is entitled to wear the footwear of their choice. Even an over-played choice like Converse.
5. Big, black, clunky shoes. The 90's were as cruel with their fashions as the 80's. Possibly worse. And the one item I look back at with the most fear and loathing were those clunky-heeled, un-cute, goth/grunge/club kid clonkers we wore. Sure, they're comfy, but MAN are they UGLY. Embrace the curvy heel, ladies! You'll look better for it.
What looks from the past still haunt you today? And have you banished them from your closets? And then lit sage to remove any lingering trace of horror?
Friday, November 18, 2011
Monday, November 14, 2011
Same Thing, Different Day
It's the same old story - I'm busy, I haven't taken outfit photos, my back aches, oy my poor feet, damn kids get off my lawn! In other words, I haven't posted in quite some time. My bad.
However, I have worn costumes, and I have taken pictures of THEM at least. So! Here you go! More costume pictures. Hell, at least I'm wearing something, right? Right?
A week ago Saturday, I worked at the Minnesota Society of Costumers Steampunk Sale. My other Steampunk costume was at the cleaners, so I wore this:
Um, yeah. This outfit is a wee bit more bare than I thought it was as I wore it. But pictures don't lie. Too much belly! Not enough, you know, SHIRT. Ah well, it was comfy and I didn't overheat!
Steampunk:
Tiny top hat, Claire's Boutique decorated by me.
Grey half vest, Savers
White half shirt with banded collar, Savers and then cut off by me.
Black knitted hand warmers, some teeny-bopper store in Chicago.
Burgundy velvet bloomers, Opitz Outlet. They are Triple Five Soul from the Holiday Collection, originally $95 and I got them for $5.
Black patterned tights, ???
Black bull rider boots, Durango via eBay.
Then, last Saturday, I showed the world which football team I loved the best with this number. I wore it to its first MN event, the MarsCon Masquerade. Most people loved the costume, if not the team:
My Green Bay Packer Elizabethan court gown. GO PACK GO!
Homage to the greatest football team in the history of ever:
Cheesehead top hat, Mall of America
Fabric and trims, Mill End and Jo Ann's
Football purse, Jo Ann's
Patterned and sewn by my bestie, Laura, and me.
Here I am with my biggest rival:
And yes, I'm posting this during the Monday Night Football match-up of the Vikings v. Packers! GO PACK GO!
However, I have worn costumes, and I have taken pictures of THEM at least. So! Here you go! More costume pictures. Hell, at least I'm wearing something, right? Right?
A week ago Saturday, I worked at the Minnesota Society of Costumers Steampunk Sale. My other Steampunk costume was at the cleaners, so I wore this:
Um, yeah. This outfit is a wee bit more bare than I thought it was as I wore it. But pictures don't lie. Too much belly! Not enough, you know, SHIRT. Ah well, it was comfy and I didn't overheat!
Steampunk:
Tiny top hat, Claire's Boutique decorated by me.
Grey half vest, Savers
White half shirt with banded collar, Savers and then cut off by me.
Black knitted hand warmers, some teeny-bopper store in Chicago.
Burgundy velvet bloomers, Opitz Outlet. They are Triple Five Soul from the Holiday Collection, originally $95 and I got them for $5.
Black patterned tights, ???
Black bull rider boots, Durango via eBay.
Then, last Saturday, I showed the world which football team I loved the best with this number. I wore it to its first MN event, the MarsCon Masquerade. Most people loved the costume, if not the team:
My Green Bay Packer Elizabethan court gown. GO PACK GO!
Homage to the greatest football team in the history of ever:
Cheesehead top hat, Mall of America
Fabric and trims, Mill End and Jo Ann's
Football purse, Jo Ann's
Patterned and sewn by my bestie, Laura, and me.
Here I am with my biggest rival:
And yes, I'm posting this during the Monday Night Football match-up of the Vikings v. Packers! GO PACK GO!
Friday, November 4, 2011
A Theme
I like dressing for a theme, whether it's real or imagined. Wednesday night, I had a meeting with the Minnesota Society of Costumers (I'm a board member) to discuss our Steampunk Christmas Carol party. So I thought it an appropriate time to bust out a wee bit o'punk:
We gathered at Baker's Square, in order to partake of the FREE PIE:
above: Happy Bunch of Pie-Eaters. Um. That kind of sounds dirty... And yes, one of our board members Skypes in from Austin, MN.
Of course, meetings at Baker's Square can lead to photo-bombing with pie:
And all situations lead to Too Much RAWK For One Hand:
Steampunk-esque Outfit:
Lace shirt, Target by way of ARC Value Village by way of my bestie, Laura
Olive drab jacket, MASSIVE sale at The Gap over the 4th of July
Tan skinny cargo pants, Target Mossimo brand
Black fold-over boots, Payless Fall 2010
We gathered at Baker's Square, in order to partake of the FREE PIE:
above: Happy Bunch of Pie-Eaters. Um. That kind of sounds dirty... And yes, one of our board members Skypes in from Austin, MN.
Of course, meetings at Baker's Square can lead to photo-bombing with pie:
And all situations lead to Too Much RAWK For One Hand:
Steampunk-esque Outfit:
Lace shirt, Target by way of ARC Value Village by way of my bestie, Laura
Olive drab jacket, MASSIVE sale at The Gap over the 4th of July
Tan skinny cargo pants, Target Mossimo brand
Black fold-over boots, Payless Fall 2010
Wednesday, November 2, 2011
Halloween Recap
No pictures - I didn't wear a costume (I KNOW. I'm a costumer who doesn't costume for Halloween. WEIRD.) but I did wear an all-black, ergo all-boring outfit. And I ate candy. And I watched Halloween.
I was also reminded of Halloween 3, Season of the Witch, aka the Halloween that has nothing to do with Michael Meyers, aka the Halloween movie that SUCKS. Have you guys seen this dog? It's about Druids and Stonehenge and masks. Seriously. And it contains some of the worst acting ever acted in a horror movie.
I saw Season back in high school at a party - I was a nerd, I hung with fellow nerds, and our idea of a cool party was watching bad 80's horror movies. Therefore, I've seen such fine films as Season of the Witch, Nightmare on Elm Street 2, and The House.
I also got to see epic movies like The Lost Boys and Sheila's pick, Near Dark. Sadly though, the clinkers outweighed the hits.
What is the WORST horror movie you've ever seen? The one so lacking in scares, it actually pissed you off. For me? The over-hyped first Friday The Thirteenth. Bor. Ring.
I was also reminded of Halloween 3, Season of the Witch, aka the Halloween that has nothing to do with Michael Meyers, aka the Halloween movie that SUCKS. Have you guys seen this dog? It's about Druids and Stonehenge and masks. Seriously. And it contains some of the worst acting ever acted in a horror movie.
I saw Season back in high school at a party - I was a nerd, I hung with fellow nerds, and our idea of a cool party was watching bad 80's horror movies. Therefore, I've seen such fine films as Season of the Witch, Nightmare on Elm Street 2, and The House.
I also got to see epic movies like The Lost Boys and Sheila's pick, Near Dark. Sadly though, the clinkers outweighed the hits.
What is the WORST horror movie you've ever seen? The one so lacking in scares, it actually pissed you off. For me? The over-hyped first Friday The Thirteenth. Bor. Ring.
Thursday, October 27, 2011
In Honor Of The Greatest Holiday EVER
That would be Halloween, of course. When else are you given license to dress kinda slutty and eat one metric shitton of candy? Unless that's a normal Saturday night for you, in which case? NO JUDGMENT.
I no longer dress kinda slutty (I'm nearly 40, peeps), but I still indulge in sweets. I also indulge during the season in a slightly more terrifying manner - Scary Movie Marathons!
Here's what is on my viewing list for Halloween 2011:
The Thing (1982 version). According to a vehement discussion with my father, The Thing with Kurt Russell is NOT the original. The one with James Arness is, and my father would like you all to know that it is SO MUCH BETTER. Whatever. I consider the apparent remake to be one of the freakiest movies in the history of ever. The commercial scared the crap out of me as a kid - so imagine what the whole movie does to me.
Halloween, the first. Rob Zombie, I love you. You're handsome, I love your music, and you seem like a cool person to hang with. However? PLEASE STOP MAKING MOVIES. BECAUSE THEY ALL SUCK SO HARD. Avoid the Halloween remake like the plague, and plug in the original, aka The Best.
April Fool's Day. Dudes, have you seen this flick? It is an 80's classic, and the gateway drug for horror movie lovers like myself. It's scary, it's not too gory, the actors are adorable and believable, and the ending is AWESOME. I love this movie so much that I try to watch it at least once a year. Someone should really buy it for me on DVD for Christmas... hint!
And so Halloween isn't a total 80's Fest, Paranormal Activity 2. I saw the first PA and it scared the ever-lovin' CRAP out of me. One of my big childhood fears is being drug out of bed by the ankle by some unseen (or worse, SEEN) force. Gah, so scary!!! I'm hoping PA2 is almost as scary. It's got babies and puppies in it, which is a recipe for freaktastic.
What are your big plans for All Hallow's Eve?
I no longer dress kinda slutty (I'm nearly 40, peeps), but I still indulge in sweets. I also indulge during the season in a slightly more terrifying manner - Scary Movie Marathons!
Here's what is on my viewing list for Halloween 2011:
The Thing (1982 version). According to a vehement discussion with my father, The Thing with Kurt Russell is NOT the original. The one with James Arness is, and my father would like you all to know that it is SO MUCH BETTER. Whatever. I consider the apparent remake to be one of the freakiest movies in the history of ever. The commercial scared the crap out of me as a kid - so imagine what the whole movie does to me.
Halloween, the first. Rob Zombie, I love you. You're handsome, I love your music, and you seem like a cool person to hang with. However? PLEASE STOP MAKING MOVIES. BECAUSE THEY ALL SUCK SO HARD. Avoid the Halloween remake like the plague, and plug in the original, aka The Best.
April Fool's Day. Dudes, have you seen this flick? It is an 80's classic, and the gateway drug for horror movie lovers like myself. It's scary, it's not too gory, the actors are adorable and believable, and the ending is AWESOME. I love this movie so much that I try to watch it at least once a year. Someone should really buy it for me on DVD for Christmas... hint!
And so Halloween isn't a total 80's Fest, Paranormal Activity 2. I saw the first PA and it scared the ever-lovin' CRAP out of me. One of my big childhood fears is being drug out of bed by the ankle by some unseen (or worse, SEEN) force. Gah, so scary!!! I'm hoping PA2 is almost as scary. It's got babies and puppies in it, which is a recipe for freaktastic.
What are your big plans for All Hallow's Eve?
Friday, October 21, 2011
Meant To Be
You know what I hate? I hate it when people say something was meant to be.* No, no, NO. If you want something to happen, make it happen. Don't just rest on your laurels and hope good things come to you.
That being said, I do believe this top was meant to live in my closet. I tried it on last week at ARC Value Village, and then put it back on the rack without buying. Then? I thought about it for DAYS. So when I returned to ARC and saw it hanging just where I left it... a week later... I know we belonged together forever. Awwwww, it's like twue wuv:
My favorite part are the sleeves. I like a tucked-up sleeve - I'm lazy, and the sleeve is rolling itself up so I don't have to:
The only downer? It's now too cold in MN to wear a sheer 3/4 sleeve shirt without layering something over the top. So this is what I actually looked like all day:
The Outfit Of Destiny:
Dark-rinse jean jacket, Goodwill's last massive garage sale (God, I miss those sales)
Sheer plaid tunic top, New York and Co. by way of ARC Value Village
Black leggings, Old Navy on sale for $5!
Grey OTK socks, Target for just $5!
Black leather faux Frye boots, Target from my SIL for Christmas 2010
*I was a Realtor for years, and it drove me nuts when my clients would say, "If we don't get an offer/If our offer isn't accepted, then it wasn't meant to be." NO, you dip-shits. That's when we NEGOTIATE. GAH! Your damn house ain't going to sell itself! Your damn house ain't going to buy itself! Quit being so damn passive-aggressive and work with me, people!
And that is why I am no longer a Realtor. The End.
That being said, I do believe this top was meant to live in my closet. I tried it on last week at ARC Value Village, and then put it back on the rack without buying. Then? I thought about it for DAYS. So when I returned to ARC and saw it hanging just where I left it... a week later... I know we belonged together forever. Awwwww, it's like twue wuv:
My favorite part are the sleeves. I like a tucked-up sleeve - I'm lazy, and the sleeve is rolling itself up so I don't have to:
The only downer? It's now too cold in MN to wear a sheer 3/4 sleeve shirt without layering something over the top. So this is what I actually looked like all day:
The Outfit Of Destiny:
Dark-rinse jean jacket, Goodwill's last massive garage sale (God, I miss those sales)
Sheer plaid tunic top, New York and Co. by way of ARC Value Village
Black leggings, Old Navy on sale for $5!
Grey OTK socks, Target for just $5!
Black leather faux Frye boots, Target from my SIL for Christmas 2010
*I was a Realtor for years, and it drove me nuts when my clients would say, "If we don't get an offer/If our offer isn't accepted, then it wasn't meant to be." NO, you dip-shits. That's when we NEGOTIATE. GAH! Your damn house ain't going to sell itself! Your damn house ain't going to buy itself! Quit being so damn passive-aggressive and work with me, people!
And that is why I am no longer a Realtor. The End.
Tuesday, October 18, 2011
The Most Interestingly Boring Outfit I Could Muster On A Monday
How's THAT for a mouthful of a title?!?! However, it perfectly describes what I wore yesterday when I taught real estate class. My class seemed to like me, and they all paid very close attention, so I guess this look didn't totally suck. Yay!
Ahhh. From this photo you can see how triangularly-shaped I truly am. Yup, I'm a pear. And now that I'm almost FORTY FREAKIN' YEARS OLD, I've gotten (mostly) over it. The way I see it, all that extra fat in my hips and booty will keep me alive during a famine. Not that the time for famine is nigh, but it's nice to be prepared.
Here I am, being all stern and teacher-like (Yeah, right. I never look like this in class...):
Mildly Interesting Teacher Outfit
Purple draped front T, Express on sale buy-one get-one 50% off
Pale purple/pink/grey vest, The Gap by way of Savers for just $8
Charcoal grey pinstripe pants, Express on sale buy-one get- one 50% off
Black dance shoes, Nike from their outlet store
Ahhh. From this photo you can see how triangularly-shaped I truly am. Yup, I'm a pear. And now that I'm almost FORTY FREAKIN' YEARS OLD, I've gotten (mostly) over it. The way I see it, all that extra fat in my hips and booty will keep me alive during a famine. Not that the time for famine is nigh, but it's nice to be prepared.
Here I am, being all stern and teacher-like (Yeah, right. I never look like this in class...):
Mildly Interesting Teacher Outfit
Purple draped front T, Express on sale buy-one get-one 50% off
Pale purple/pink/grey vest, The Gap by way of Savers for just $8
Charcoal grey pinstripe pants, Express on sale buy-one get- one 50% off
Black dance shoes, Nike from their outlet store
Monday, October 17, 2011
Who Opened The Fridge?
Apparently, Fall has fallen. Hard. On my HEAD. In other words, baby? It's cold outside. Too cold for what I wore last Thursday on air:
Oh sure - I look all smiley and happy. But on the inside, I felt like this:
Also? If I'm going to try and rock bare legs, I best bust out the tanning lotion. Those are some pale stems there, yes? Yes.
However, I bought that sweater with the intention of wearing it over that dress. And I will do it again... as long as I bust out a pair of leggings to wear underneath.
The Too Cool For School... and MN Outfit:
Red flyaway cardigan, Mossimo for Target
Black sleeveless mini dress, The Gap for just FOUR DOLLARS.
Black leather boots, Circa Joan & David from Macy's
Oh sure - I look all smiley and happy. But on the inside, I felt like this:
Also? If I'm going to try and rock bare legs, I best bust out the tanning lotion. Those are some pale stems there, yes? Yes.
However, I bought that sweater with the intention of wearing it over that dress. And I will do it again... as long as I bust out a pair of leggings to wear underneath.
The Too Cool For School... and MN Outfit:
Red flyaway cardigan, Mossimo for Target
Black sleeveless mini dress, The Gap for just FOUR DOLLARS.
Black leather boots, Circa Joan & David from Macy's
Friday, October 14, 2011
The Texas Chainsaw Dresses
Dudes. DUDES. I keep buying under-$15 dresses! It's as if there was a 300 lbs Texan maniac forcing me to shop. "Buy this dress, or I'll cut off your face and wear it as a mask!" That's a good reason to hit the stores, yes? Sure!
Granted, the only real reason I keep buying dresses is because I keep finding them. In fact, no former meat-packing-plant butcher with mommy issues is holding a chainsaw to my head. Sigh. I just need to avoid stores, sales, the Internet and fashion magazines. They are all a bunch of enablers.
However! In the mean time! Here are two more dresses I bought:
OHBEGAH, you guys. I love this dress SO HARD. It is comfy, it is flattering, and it goes with everything in my shoe/accessory/jewelry stash. LOVE IT LIKE I WANNA MARRY IT.
New Dress #1:
Grey/black/dark purple vaguely animal print-esque dress, Savers in Bloomingto for $12.99
Silver lariat and ball necklace, stole it from my buddy Laura whilst house-sitting (um... hi Laura!)
Silver hoops, white gold earrings from my Mom (didn't steal these, tho)
Black boots with silver trimmings, Circa Joan & David from Macy's (?) from 2003 bought on sale
And then, while I was trying on something completely different, I saw this dress on sale at Old Navy for 75% off. That's practically FREE:
My very first maxi dress! I love this thing - it's like wearing pretty and presentable pyjamas (now say that 10 times fast). It is so soft and comfy. And brightly colored! Best of all, it has full coverage on top, so I can wear a bra with it.
And because it has a high waist, I can eat whatever the hell I want, and NO ONE would be the wiser! It's even long enough to come down to my ankles. And I'm tall!
above: the shoes underneath my very long, very new, very cute dress.
New Dress #2:
Black cropped cardigan with 3/4 sleeves, Marshall's
Black/pink/green/yellow/white floral print maxi dress, Old Navy (new stock) for $11.23
Black Aeresole sandals, ARC Value Village brand new
And now? I need to run screaming into the night. NO MORE DRESS SHOPPING!!!!!
Granted, the only real reason I keep buying dresses is because I keep finding them. In fact, no former meat-packing-plant butcher with mommy issues is holding a chainsaw to my head. Sigh. I just need to avoid stores, sales, the Internet and fashion magazines. They are all a bunch of enablers.
However! In the mean time! Here are two more dresses I bought:
OHBEGAH, you guys. I love this dress SO HARD. It is comfy, it is flattering, and it goes with everything in my shoe/accessory/jewelry stash. LOVE IT LIKE I WANNA MARRY IT.
New Dress #1:
Grey/black/dark purple vaguely animal print-esque dress, Savers in Bloomingto for $12.99
Silver lariat and ball necklace, stole it from my buddy Laura whilst house-sitting (um... hi Laura!)
Silver hoops, white gold earrings from my Mom (didn't steal these, tho)
Black boots with silver trimmings, Circa Joan & David from Macy's (?) from 2003 bought on sale
And then, while I was trying on something completely different, I saw this dress on sale at Old Navy for 75% off. That's practically FREE:
My very first maxi dress! I love this thing - it's like wearing pretty and presentable pyjamas (now say that 10 times fast). It is so soft and comfy. And brightly colored! Best of all, it has full coverage on top, so I can wear a bra with it.
And because it has a high waist, I can eat whatever the hell I want, and NO ONE would be the wiser! It's even long enough to come down to my ankles. And I'm tall!
above: the shoes underneath my very long, very new, very cute dress.
New Dress #2:
Black cropped cardigan with 3/4 sleeves, Marshall's
Black/pink/green/yellow/white floral print maxi dress, Old Navy (new stock) for $11.23
Black Aeresole sandals, ARC Value Village brand new
And now? I need to run screaming into the night. NO MORE DRESS SHOPPING!!!!!
Monday, October 10, 2011
I Am Haunted By Dresses
To exorcise the evil and violent Ghosts of Dresses Past, I am compelled to by adorable, well-fitting, inexpensive dresses wherever I find them. Makes sense, yes? YES. If I don't buy the cute dresses, they'll hunt me down in roving, ravenous packs and EAT MY BRAINS.*
Whatever. I like dresses, and I'm going to keep on buying them, as long as they cost less than $15, like this one:
It looks cute coming. And going:
I found this beauty hanging out on the discard rack at Savers (ALWAYS check the discard rack at thrift stores, peeps). Apparently, it had not fit the person who first found it. Which is a shame as it is so of-the-season (tres Mad Man, no?), and new. As in, still-had-the-tags-and-spare-buttons-attached new.
Ah well, their loss is my inexpensive gain! I styled this up fairly simple - just boots and silver hoops. I didn't want to distract from the dress's clean lines and vavoom shape. I feel so Joan in it! Albeit, less boobular endowed. And blonde.
Dress, Merona brand from Target via Saver's ($12.99!)
Earrings, Silver mod hoops (trust me, they're in there - tho buried by my hairs) gift from my Mom
Boots, Circa Joan & David bought on sale at Macy's 6 years ago
*Remember, if you do encounter roving, ravenous packs of ANYTHING, take cover from an elevated position and aim for the head. Words to live by.
Whatever. I like dresses, and I'm going to keep on buying them, as long as they cost less than $15, like this one:
It looks cute coming. And going:
I found this beauty hanging out on the discard rack at Savers (ALWAYS check the discard rack at thrift stores, peeps). Apparently, it had not fit the person who first found it. Which is a shame as it is so of-the-season (tres Mad Man, no?), and new. As in, still-had-the-tags-and-spare-buttons-attached new.
Ah well, their loss is my inexpensive gain! I styled this up fairly simple - just boots and silver hoops. I didn't want to distract from the dress's clean lines and vavoom shape. I feel so Joan in it! Albeit, less boobular endowed. And blonde.
Dress, Merona brand from Target via Saver's ($12.99!)
Earrings, Silver mod hoops (trust me, they're in there - tho buried by my hairs) gift from my Mom
Boots, Circa Joan & David bought on sale at Macy's 6 years ago
*Remember, if you do encounter roving, ravenous packs of ANYTHING, take cover from an elevated position and aim for the head. Words to live by.
Friday, October 7, 2011
Oh, Why Not?
When I saw this wrap top at ARC Value Village in Richfield, I thought, "Huh. Well that's not something you see every day." And thus, for a mere $6.99, I bought it. Sure, it's totally random:
But look at! Flouncy sleeves! They even have sequins on them!
Excuse the rando pose. I was trying to show off the back of the wrap, and the drape of the sleeves. Instead, I look like I am cheerfully being frisked by a cop. I'm quite certain I would not be cheerful if a cop frisked me. Unless he looked like Gerard Butler. I could roll with that. Moving on.
Deets:
Wrap top, ARC Value Village
Peach T-shirt, Target Merona brand
Skinny jeans, Calvin Klein from Macys
Black chunky sandales, Vince Camuto from Macy's clearance rack.
Leather cuff, vendor from the MN Renaissance Festival
But look at! Flouncy sleeves! They even have sequins on them!
Excuse the rando pose. I was trying to show off the back of the wrap, and the drape of the sleeves. Instead, I look like I am cheerfully being frisked by a cop. I'm quite certain I would not be cheerful if a cop frisked me. Unless he looked like Gerard Butler. I could roll with that. Moving on.
Deets:
Wrap top, ARC Value Village
Peach T-shirt, Target Merona brand
Skinny jeans, Calvin Klein from Macys
Black chunky sandales, Vince Camuto from Macy's clearance rack.
Leather cuff, vendor from the MN Renaissance Festival
Wednesday, October 5, 2011
I Should Just Get Over Myself
I started this blog to post what I wear on a daily basis. And yet? I often think what I'm wearing is dull, or not fashion-y enough.
However, the whole POINT of the blog is to have an honest accounting of what I wear, and where I buy what I wear. So I have decided to Get The Hell Over My Own Damn Self and just post my damn clothes, already. I hope you'll stick around for the ride.
So! Here is my last outfit I photographed. It's from a week ago, when the weather in MN was cool enough to allow for sweaters. Today? It's 89 degrees outside. Not so much sweater weather, no?
As you can see, it was warm enough last week for open-toe footwear. Hell, today it's warm enough for a SWIM SUIT. Which, as you know, is not work-appropriate. But this sweater is!
I bought this ruffled shrug this July, stuck it in my closet, and then COMPLETELY FORGOT ABOUT IT. So much for being frugal...
However, it's on my radar, and I can't wait to style it up all winter long. Mmmmm... ruffles...
Wanna know what I was doing last Wednesday whilst I wore this outfit? Sure you do!
I was contemplating one last costume to sew for the Minnesota Renaissance Festival. I didn't NEED a new costume, but I was so close to being finished! So I pushed through, and finished is up (picture below).
The Must-Sew-All-The-Things Outfit:
Black and white turtleneck, Express clearance rack from Fall 2010.
Black ruffled shrug, Forever 21 ($15!) but I don't think it's available anymore. Damn their fast turnover!
Bootcut jeans, Marshalls (they are Tahari - aka my "grown-up" jeans)
Black wedges, Savers - Marc by Marc Jacob!
And here is what I made:
That's me and my "ex-pirate-husband," Obediah Jib (his real name is Dave). My Fest character is Lilith MacDonald Jib - fallen Scottish noblewoman and ex-wife of a pirate. I have two pirate daughters - twins - Ophelia and Opaline. Yup, we have a good, silly-fun time!
However, the whole POINT of the blog is to have an honest accounting of what I wear, and where I buy what I wear. So I have decided to Get The Hell Over My Own Damn Self and just post my damn clothes, already. I hope you'll stick around for the ride.
So! Here is my last outfit I photographed. It's from a week ago, when the weather in MN was cool enough to allow for sweaters. Today? It's 89 degrees outside. Not so much sweater weather, no?
As you can see, it was warm enough last week for open-toe footwear. Hell, today it's warm enough for a SWIM SUIT. Which, as you know, is not work-appropriate. But this sweater is!
I bought this ruffled shrug this July, stuck it in my closet, and then COMPLETELY FORGOT ABOUT IT. So much for being frugal...
However, it's on my radar, and I can't wait to style it up all winter long. Mmmmm... ruffles...
Wanna know what I was doing last Wednesday whilst I wore this outfit? Sure you do!
I was contemplating one last costume to sew for the Minnesota Renaissance Festival. I didn't NEED a new costume, but I was so close to being finished! So I pushed through, and finished is up (picture below).
The Must-Sew-All-The-Things Outfit:
Black and white turtleneck, Express clearance rack from Fall 2010.
Black ruffled shrug, Forever 21 ($15!) but I don't think it's available anymore. Damn their fast turnover!
Bootcut jeans, Marshalls (they are Tahari - aka my "grown-up" jeans)
Black wedges, Savers - Marc by Marc Jacob!
And here is what I made:
That's me and my "ex-pirate-husband," Obediah Jib (his real name is Dave). My Fest character is Lilith MacDonald Jib - fallen Scottish noblewoman and ex-wife of a pirate. I have two pirate daughters - twins - Ophelia and Opaline. Yup, we have a good, silly-fun time!
Thursday, September 29, 2011
Once More With The Excuses
Dudes. DUDES. DUDES, I KNOW. I am a bad, bad, bad daily style blogger. Sheesh, I can't even do once a week. However, let me explain (No, that will take to long. Let me sum up.) my absence with the following photo blast...
My Posse and I went to the Minnesota Renaissance Festival in costume. As we are wont to do. However, we didn't go in just any costumes, oh no. We went in the FANCIEST, BLINGY-EST, MOST ELABORATE COSTUMES IN THE FREAKING WORLD. Because that is how we roll.
Here is mine. Warning: it is horribly period inappropriate. So if that sort of thing bothers you, move on.
It is a fitted comfort gown. Which is a complete oxymoron, but I do not care. It's so pretty! And it makes me look like I weigh 10 lbs! Unlike historically accurate comfort gowns, which tend to make one look like a house.
I also had a walking cane - or my Tzarina Pimp Stick. Take a gander - I'm sure you can guess what it really is:
C'mon, you know what it is, right? Sure you do:
It's part of a curtain rod. Since it was damaged and missing the other finial, I got it for a mere $3.50. Here are the deets on the rest of my "garb."
Fur hat - Ragstock, $11.99
Tiara on hat - Party City, then painted and blinged out with glued-on jewels from my stash of such things.
Red overdress with puffed sleeves - Dress pattern by Laura Ulak, sleeve pattern by Margo Anderson, made from red/black shot polyester taffeta from Hobby Lobby and trimmed with black velvet, black frogs and black braid. BTW? Sewing on braid? SUCKS SO BAD. And hand-sewing on frogs? SUCKS EVEN WORSE.
Black fur-trimmed sleeves - Pattern by me, and they are removable. Made from black Asian brocade from JoAnn Fabric and black fur pillow cases, also from JoAnn's.
Black fur collar - Pattern by me, also from the pillowcase.
Black corset cover (you can barely see it) - Pattern by me, Asian brocade
Black underskirt - Pattern by me, Asian brocade.
Jewelry - various thrift/consignment stores.
Here's a close-up of the top:
(Yeah, I know. I had a random piece of hair sticking out through the entire first photo shoot, and NO ONE TOLD ME.)
Even though this was a bitch-kitty to trim (Laura did all the major sewing), and even though it was amazingly dusty at MNRF, I LOVED wearing this. When you dress like (Russian) royalty, people treat you like royalty.
Confession - this was supposed to be made out of red Asian brocade fabric, to match my royal character: Imelda, Marquessa de los Zappatos. But the brocade was an epic failure of epic proportions, so viva la Russia! Plus it was chilly, and I wanted to wear my fur hat.
And since she made herself one stunning-ass costume, here is my seamstress buddy, Laura:
So much bling and trim and what-have-you went into that costume. She also modified or made a bunch of other costumes people are wearing. And as her trusty side-kick, I helped. Thus the busy, no-posting as of late.
However! Tomorrow, we resume our regular, non-costume posting.
My Posse and I went to the Minnesota Renaissance Festival in costume. As we are wont to do. However, we didn't go in just any costumes, oh no. We went in the FANCIEST, BLINGY-EST, MOST ELABORATE COSTUMES IN THE FREAKING WORLD. Because that is how we roll.
Here is mine. Warning: it is horribly period inappropriate. So if that sort of thing bothers you, move on.
It is a fitted comfort gown. Which is a complete oxymoron, but I do not care. It's so pretty! And it makes me look like I weigh 10 lbs! Unlike historically accurate comfort gowns, which tend to make one look like a house.
I also had a walking cane - or my Tzarina Pimp Stick. Take a gander - I'm sure you can guess what it really is:
C'mon, you know what it is, right? Sure you do:
It's part of a curtain rod. Since it was damaged and missing the other finial, I got it for a mere $3.50. Here are the deets on the rest of my "garb."
Fur hat - Ragstock, $11.99
Tiara on hat - Party City, then painted and blinged out with glued-on jewels from my stash of such things.
Red overdress with puffed sleeves - Dress pattern by Laura Ulak, sleeve pattern by Margo Anderson, made from red/black shot polyester taffeta from Hobby Lobby and trimmed with black velvet, black frogs and black braid. BTW? Sewing on braid? SUCKS SO BAD. And hand-sewing on frogs? SUCKS EVEN WORSE.
Black fur-trimmed sleeves - Pattern by me, and they are removable. Made from black Asian brocade from JoAnn Fabric and black fur pillow cases, also from JoAnn's.
Black fur collar - Pattern by me, also from the pillowcase.
Black corset cover (you can barely see it) - Pattern by me, Asian brocade
Black underskirt - Pattern by me, Asian brocade.
Jewelry - various thrift/consignment stores.
Here's a close-up of the top:
(Yeah, I know. I had a random piece of hair sticking out through the entire first photo shoot, and NO ONE TOLD ME.)
Even though this was a bitch-kitty to trim (Laura did all the major sewing), and even though it was amazingly dusty at MNRF, I LOVED wearing this. When you dress like (Russian) royalty, people treat you like royalty.
Confession - this was supposed to be made out of red Asian brocade fabric, to match my royal character: Imelda, Marquessa de los Zappatos. But the brocade was an epic failure of epic proportions, so viva la Russia! Plus it was chilly, and I wanted to wear my fur hat.
And since she made herself one stunning-ass costume, here is my seamstress buddy, Laura:
So much bling and trim and what-have-you went into that costume. She also modified or made a bunch of other costumes people are wearing. And as her trusty side-kick, I helped. Thus the busy, no-posting as of late.
However! Tomorrow, we resume our regular, non-costume posting.
Monday, September 12, 2011
Alive And Dressing
Yup. I'm still here. And still wearing clothes. Like you do.
See? Clothes. Bright ones, at that. For a girl in love with black, this is quite a departure for me.
In fact, my clothes were so bright, I had to wear shades. But not a smile, because the day I wore this outfit, I was being KILLED by my allergies. I have them under control now, but they still suck the life out of me.
See? Clothes. Bright ones, at that. For a girl in love with black, this is quite a departure for me.
In fact, my clothes were so bright, I had to wear shades. But not a smile, because the day I wore this outfit, I was being KILLED by my allergies. I have them under control now, but they still suck the life out of me.
My Grumpy Duds:
Sunglasses, some street vendor selling "Prada"
Silver hoops, Tommy Bahama
Silver necklace, Savers Thrift Store
Blue t-shirt, Target (LOVE this style o' tee)
White jeans, Tommy Bahama
Nude shoes, Opitz Outlet
And yes, I wore white after Labor Day. I am a rebel like that.
Thursday, September 1, 2011
At Least I'm Covered
GAH. These last few days (weeks?) have been hectic as can be, thanks to the Great MN Get-Together. Which is also known as our State Fair. The MN State Fair is more than just your average Joe Schmoe fair. It is a FAIR of EPIC PROPORTIONS. And I do my Fox 9 segments out there, thus sucking up copious amounts of time that could otherwise be spent blogging about what I'm wearing.
It's also Ren Fest season in MN, so if I'm not at the Fair, I'm at the Fest. Or sewing for the Fest. Or DRIVING TO THE FEST GAHWHYISITSOFARAWAY?????? Ehem. Moving on.
So here. Here's what my bestie and I wore last weekend to the Minnesota Renaissance Festival. Please bear in mind that I am in no way period appropriate. And that I in no way give a flying hoo-hah about that.
On Me:
Black straw Elizabethan top hat with red trim, La Paloma Hats from the Bristol Ren Faire 2010
White chemise, sewn by me
Red collared short bodice, patterned and sewn by me
Black flocked (!) pants, Savers and modified by me
Black boots, Payless
Red shot silk scarf, MNRF 2010
On Laura:
The Elenora gown mock-up #2, pattern by Margo Anderson, cut out by Laura and I, sewn by Laura. White linen fabric with brown and gold pattern. Trimmed with gold beading and gold piping.
Coif (in the back, you can't really see it), sewn by Laura
And here is our My Space Face photo. Because... yeah.
I'll post pictures of real clothing soon. Promise. Maybe. We'll see.
It's also Ren Fest season in MN, so if I'm not at the Fair, I'm at the Fest. Or sewing for the Fest. Or DRIVING TO THE FEST GAHWHYISITSOFARAWAY?????? Ehem. Moving on.
So here. Here's what my bestie and I wore last weekend to the Minnesota Renaissance Festival. Please bear in mind that I am in no way period appropriate. And that I in no way give a flying hoo-hah about that.
On Me:
Black straw Elizabethan top hat with red trim, La Paloma Hats from the Bristol Ren Faire 2010
White chemise, sewn by me
Red collared short bodice, patterned and sewn by me
Black flocked (!) pants, Savers and modified by me
Black boots, Payless
Red shot silk scarf, MNRF 2010
On Laura:
The Elenora gown mock-up #2, pattern by Margo Anderson, cut out by Laura and I, sewn by Laura. White linen fabric with brown and gold pattern. Trimmed with gold beading and gold piping.
Coif (in the back, you can't really see it), sewn by Laura
And here is our My Space Face photo. Because... yeah.
I'll post pictures of real clothing soon. Promise. Maybe. We'll see.
Monday, August 22, 2011
The Shoes Of Summer
Like the boys of summer! Except, you know, not at all. Moving on.
Last summer, I lamented high and low about the lack of cute, comfy sandals for sale. I searched high and low, but everything I found was a wedge. I don't like wedges. I find them difficult to walk in, and I'm already clutzy, so why add to my propensity to fall down?
This summer, I held out little hope that I'd find cute sandals. And during the spring season, my lack of hope was justified. In short? I found nuthin'.
But then! It seemed that the Shoe Gods heard my prayers and answered them with a ready abundance of pretty, well-priced footwear! Wanna see them? SURE YOU DO:
The "gateway" sandals, also know as "the only wedge I like." I found these at Saver's at the start of the summer - they're Michael Kors!
The freebies. I received a $25 gift card to Famous Footwear, and bought these Franco Sartos on clearance.
The sandals I didn't take off for weeks. These Aerosoles were BRAND NEW at ARC Value Village thrift store in Richfield.
(awwww, see my piggie stuffie in the background?!?!)
The shoes that are not black. I bought these sandals on sale at Target. I think they have a few pairs left on uber-clearance for $7.
The dream shoes. These are my first pair of Vince Camutos, bought on extreme clearance at the Macy's One Day sale this last weekend. I know. They are similar to the other THREE PAIRS I own. Whatever.
Bonus Round! These next shoes are not shoes. They are boot - but I bought them this summer on eBay. And Oh. My. GAH. I love them so hard.
Behold my Durango Bull Rider boots, purchased for a mere $70. BULL RIDER BOOTS. I feel so bad ass in them. Or, at least, I will - once it gets cold enough to wear them.
Do you wanna pair? Then go here http://www.ebay.com/itm/DURANGO-14-Western-Bull-Rider-GRANNY-Boots-Black-7M-/290571711799?pt=US_Women_s_Shoes&hash=item43a76c7537. Note that these are samples, so Durango may not mass produce this style. Which makes the boots unique, and therefore even MORE PERFECT.
Last summer, I lamented high and low about the lack of cute, comfy sandals for sale. I searched high and low, but everything I found was a wedge. I don't like wedges. I find them difficult to walk in, and I'm already clutzy, so why add to my propensity to fall down?
This summer, I held out little hope that I'd find cute sandals. And during the spring season, my lack of hope was justified. In short? I found nuthin'.
But then! It seemed that the Shoe Gods heard my prayers and answered them with a ready abundance of pretty, well-priced footwear! Wanna see them? SURE YOU DO:
The "gateway" sandals, also know as "the only wedge I like." I found these at Saver's at the start of the summer - they're Michael Kors!
The freebies. I received a $25 gift card to Famous Footwear, and bought these Franco Sartos on clearance.
The sandals I didn't take off for weeks. These Aerosoles were BRAND NEW at ARC Value Village thrift store in Richfield.
(awwww, see my piggie stuffie in the background?!?!)
The shoes that are not black. I bought these sandals on sale at Target. I think they have a few pairs left on uber-clearance for $7.
The dream shoes. These are my first pair of Vince Camutos, bought on extreme clearance at the Macy's One Day sale this last weekend. I know. They are similar to the other THREE PAIRS I own. Whatever.
Bonus Round! These next shoes are not shoes. They are boot - but I bought them this summer on eBay. And Oh. My. GAH. I love them so hard.
Behold my Durango Bull Rider boots, purchased for a mere $70. BULL RIDER BOOTS. I feel so bad ass in them. Or, at least, I will - once it gets cold enough to wear them.
Do you wanna pair? Then go here http://www.ebay.com/itm/DURANGO-14-Western-Bull-Rider-GRANNY-Boots-Black-7M-/290571711799?pt=US_Women_s_Shoes&hash=item43a76c7537. Note that these are samples, so Durango may not mass produce this style. Which makes the boots unique, and therefore even MORE PERFECT.
Monday, August 15, 2011
Why Yes, I DO Like Fishing
The first weekend in August, my friends and I attended the Bristol Renaissance Fair outside of Kenosha, WI. Every year, we participate in their Day of Wrong, where playtrons dress in their most outlandish, historically inappropriate costumes. And here is mine - The Fishing Opener:
Sadly, I had epic hair failure and my wee little fishing cap looked weird perched on top of my head. I also had Billy the Big Mouth Bass failure - his straps broke right before our group photo session. Ah well - I shall work out those kinks before I wear this to Minnesota's Day of Wrong in October.
I ended up looping my hair into two pigtails, which actually helped frame the hat. And I found Miller Lite to go in my cozy - so appropriate for Wisconsin, no?
The Fishing Deets:
Style of costume - a mash-up of the Dangerous Beauty-inspired courtesan mixed with the Elizabeth Swan "on the pirate ship" dress from the first Pirates movie.
Bodice pattern - Margo Anderson's Elizabethan bodice.
Sleeves pattern - copied from a Simplicity pattern, I believe
Bloomers pattern - modified pajama pants pattern. HUGEL.Y modified - we call them my Franken-bloomers.
Skirt - hand pleated! By me! I'm very proud.
Tiny hat - Build A Bear at the Mall of America, decorated with fishy buttons and massive hook.
Watery print socks - JoAnn Fabrics
Red "courtesan" shoes - Nine West
I also have a crill, bobbers attached to my shoes (which I stepped on ALL DAY), a toy fishing rod courtesy of my bestie, Laura, a Billy the Big Mouth Bass worn as a backpack (yep, he works, too!), and a fishing cozy for my beer. My jewelry consists of rubber fishing lure earrings, made by my buddy, Chelsey, and a lovely jade fish necklace (not pictured) that my buddy, Nell, gave me for Christmas.
I hope to see you at the Minnesota Renaissance Festival!
Sadly, I had epic hair failure and my wee little fishing cap looked weird perched on top of my head. I also had Billy the Big Mouth Bass failure - his straps broke right before our group photo session. Ah well - I shall work out those kinks before I wear this to Minnesota's Day of Wrong in October.
I ended up looping my hair into two pigtails, which actually helped frame the hat. And I found Miller Lite to go in my cozy - so appropriate for Wisconsin, no?
The Fishing Deets:
Style of costume - a mash-up of the Dangerous Beauty-inspired courtesan mixed with the Elizabeth Swan "on the pirate ship" dress from the first Pirates movie.
Bodice pattern - Margo Anderson's Elizabethan bodice.
Sleeves pattern - copied from a Simplicity pattern, I believe
Bloomers pattern - modified pajama pants pattern. HUGEL.Y modified - we call them my Franken-bloomers.
Skirt - hand pleated! By me! I'm very proud.
Tiny hat - Build A Bear at the Mall of America, decorated with fishy buttons and massive hook.
Watery print socks - JoAnn Fabrics
Red "courtesan" shoes - Nine West
I also have a crill, bobbers attached to my shoes (which I stepped on ALL DAY), a toy fishing rod courtesy of my bestie, Laura, a Billy the Big Mouth Bass worn as a backpack (yep, he works, too!), and a fishing cozy for my beer. My jewelry consists of rubber fishing lure earrings, made by my buddy, Chelsey, and a lovely jade fish necklace (not pictured) that my buddy, Nell, gave me for Christmas.
I hope to see you at the Minnesota Renaissance Festival!
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